and yes, you CAN do it yourself

I made a yummy sauce tonight that I thought I'd share, lest you imagine that I am all talk.
I walk the walk, too, kids.

So, my adoring and carb-enabling husband made pizza dough this afternoon (as well as a monsterous loaf of superseeded rye bread, but I digress...). It was happily rising at home when he told me about this. Immediately, I was considering what to put on it... and, using my superpower (I can remember what is in the fridge right now! because the answer is close-to-nothing), took intellectual stock of the cool chest and pantry.

dried mushrooms! aha! umame time!

a huge plastic jug of them.

from Costco. go figure.

so, I asked him to soak some. I didn't realize that this would be for too long in too much water.

When I got home, the mushrooms were rehydrated all right - into a strange, squishy, dilutely-flavored stew floating in a brown, dirt-infused broth.

But for some reason, I decided to try to make them into something. I imagined that their dark, earthy, savory, glutamic goodness was still in that bowl amongst all that water! I probably should have trashed them. But I am enormously glad that I didn't. And now, you will know what to do when this happens to you:

Rich mushroom pizza or whatever sauce a.k.a. everything in the pantry sauce (this would be great in place of a Bolognese sauce or over meaty-flavored items):

about one cup of dried mushrooms (don't bother to cut them or anything)
1.5 cu water
1/2 can tomato paste (lots of glutamate... mine was Trader Joe's organic tomato paste)
1/2 cup of good, dry red wine (I used RedTree Pinot Noir) (more here, too...)
1/3 cup sugar (do not substitute this, it is needed for caramelization and thickening of sauce - like a jam)
a few shakes of paprika
a shake of nutmeg (ONE shake of the cheap dry preground stuff, less if yours is better)
salt to taste (more than you might think)
a little garlic powder (to taste, I used maybe 1/2 tsp of the cheap stuff)
a shake of dried oregano

how to:
soak the mushrooms in the water until way rehydrated
into a large skillet over high heat, dump the following, in order:
1) the mushrooms and ALL of the liquid. allow it to come to a boil and reduce a little
2) the tomato paste, stir it in well.
3) the spices, stir.
keep reducing.
4) when reduced by 1/2, add the wine and somewhat lower the heat to a happy steady bubble.
stir.
5) continue to let reduce a bit, then add the sugar and stir very well.

turn the heat back up, keep stirring until desired thickness and yummy, scraping the caramelizing thick goodness from the edges and bottom of pan back into the sauce.
taste (let it cool a sec first, ok?)
and add salt as/if needed.

let cool slightly (it will thicken further) and serve.
this is so good. and free of fats and animal protein. but it has a very rich meaty earthy flavor.

I added some vegan sausage bits and parmesan as a topping over homemade pizza dough and cooked at 500 degrees for about 10-12 minutes. huzzah!

if you cook it, ymmv, since I never measure anything. give me your feedback, eh?